alldressedup...: WARNING: long entry

this entry will be distinguished and separated into different sections pertaining to this day of entry from the last. (seriously, i'm not sure if i made any sense)

CNY

The lunar new year came and left fairly early for me. To be exact, i don't think it came for me at all. The sense of excitement, trepidation, if i can so loosely use, didn't seem quite there. Maybe it's to do with age.

I've spent twenty years collecting ang baos, lesser years recollecting having collected any of course. Chinese new year to me is basically related to collecting them. Not much of the family togetherness part. Cos' I hardly find out new stuff anyway. Visiting was made out to be quite a chore. The thought of having such lovely and happy relations feel quite fake to me. Maybe its cos my family's too big as compared to others. It's difficult to meet up as often. I used to be interested in my cousins', relatives lives, But they were all too busy and interested in only their own. So i got the point, and decided to follow suit.

Maybe it was foolish of me, not to endeavour in my lonely quest of family bonding. (I sound so exaggerated, don't I? ha) When others started to do so, it feels all too late for me. 'If one didn't care then, why should one now?'

Motives, regrets or what? I do try not to have too suspicious a mind But hey you can't blame me for having one. However i would say, seeing everyone together was a nice touch to a lack of (can't seem to find a right word to insert here) chinese new year.

SCHOOL

some of you would have heard this a number of times from my mouth, so you can speed read this part or simply skip this whole section totally.

i have finally been offered a place in Monash University (caulfield), in Melbourne australia. you can feel happy for me, or be totally upset that i'll be there destroying your life or whatsoever (this is specially for people who hate/dislike/(fill in whichever fits perfectly), i know i can't have it all. ha) being me, i have yet to settle everything even though i've got to leave soon and yes i do mean SOON. so celebrate if you want to (hint: jayson, i'll supply one bottle of champagne if you like ha)

living wise, it's most likely i'll be living in a service apartment not too far from everything like civilisation, the city, friends (old & new, hoping desperately i can make friends there) so please come visit me or something k.. i would like to know i'm still remembered. ha.

i'm not mentioning on this blog the exact date of my departure cos' there simply is no point in doing so.

THAILAND - BANGKOK

went there just before the lunar new year to visit my dear OLD cousin, ken kor kor. finally got to meet shabu. she's so ever a darling. i miss her. we were supposed to see his new apartment which has a pretty cool name and how the apartment was envisioned to be was pretty nice. said envision, cos' his apartment's renovation wasn't done in time due to a number of misunderstandings on the contractor's part. so hopefully i'll get to see the pics. did a bit of shopping here and there, but much less than expected. Wasn't much in the mood to, with my ever present problematic situation of studying in oz.